Mojo

I think I'm back.  Back from the edge of that awful darkness that completely smothered me for a couple months.  Like the clouds that smothered the sun.  I sure did take that sun for granted living in CO.  I wonder if I will anymore?  Will I ever be able to see the sun again and not think DAMN that's gorgeous?

I am different.  I am bright!  Maybe it's in the same way that the sun looks so much freaking brighter after months of clouds and rain.  I went through the worst depression of my life (worse than after Piper was born and that other thing) and I feel so great!  Is it just the light after the darkness?  Maybe.  But maybe it's one of those events that forever alters who you actually are.  And it makes you better.  Is this what a mid-life crisis feels like?  I feel like I should go out and buy a motorcycle.  Or maybe I'll just start enjoying the people around me instead. 

I am positively buzzing with goodness right now. Buzzing! I hope this drives me every day to be a better wife and a better mom and a better sister and a better aunt and a better daughter and a better friend. I feel like I haven't been giving anyone my best of anything. Nobody. Not even myself. Everybody just gets...meh. That is a crappy way to live.

I tell you, right now I wish I could bottle the way I feel (and I don't think it's just the vitamin D).

KISS MY ASS DEPRESSION!!  I've got my mojo back.

Kristin


p.s.  I heard yesterday that this was the darkest/gloomiest winter Germany has seen in close to 60 years!